|
Get a weekly dose of Mr Damian in your inbox! Click here to subscribe Seriously, it is actually working now... |
|
|
Stories to: story@mrdamian.com Comments to: comment@mrdamian.com Most Popular
Official: Ginger people are more ugly Puppet Sooty says "I was a crack whore" Star Whores III Top Ten Burberry Sex Toys Does Fast Food Cause Sleep Wanking? Burberry to Sponsor Air Force One Mr Damian made an OBE Top 10 Ways To Freak People Out In Your Office Mr Damian encourages readers to knit jumpers for penguins Jackson Moonwalks to Freedom |
September 23, 2004
Assault Weapons Ban Expires
MV our Guns Correspondent writes: Last week the U.S congress allowed a 1994 ban on assault weapons to expire. One of our researchers had the opportunity to question a congressman about the ban on condition of anonymity. “We just basically couldn’t arsed with it,” was his immediate response, “we’ve all been pretty busy recently, have you seen the Simple Life 2 with that Paris Hilton? It's fucking brilliant.” The ban put a cap on the number of bullets a magazine could hold, restricting civilians to just 10 bullets per clip. “Research has shown that the average American only wants to shoot 6 people, so the limit on magazine capacity is largely irrelevant,” said Daniel Myers NRA president for Boise, Idaho "in fact for some people it's less" he added, before admitting to hovering around the "3-4 margins ... depending on when I last got laid".
In the early 90s the U.S. Post Office was held responsible for a number of workplace shootings after it blanketed the country with advertising urging folks to “Get to work and go postal”. The Canary Islands Tourism Board also attracted similar criticism after an advertising campaign advised people to "go Balearics" a message many illierate people in the Bible-Belt South read as "go ballistic". Most of them are now studying for their PhD's on Death Row. Posted by damian at September 23, 2004 08:50 AM | TrackBack |
MORE TOP STORIES
This weeks showbiz gossip Glitter goes down - and this time it's legal Official: Westminster Media 'Top of the Tossers' A special welcome to David Gilmour fans! Mr Damian for weekending 24th February 2006 This weeks entertainment gossip This weeks top music gossip Mr Damian for weekending Friday 17th February 2006 Hot Gossip From The Brits Mr Damian for weekending Friday 10th February Top Celeb Gossip You'll Want To Tell Your Friends Flash threatens to take on Ming in Lib Dem race Cartoon Protests Continue Subscribe to Mr Damian! Mr Damian for weekending Friday 27th January
What The Critics Say
Accolades
Reciprocals
|
|
|
|