Following the recent siege in Beslan, at which 335 people, including children, were killed Russian President Vlad ‘the Impaler’ Putin is under increasing pressure to solve the Chechyna problem.

Aides close to the President have urged him to look at a number of radical solutions, which include making peace, allowing Chechnyan independence or sending all those of Chechnyan blood to the moon.

Hardman Putin is said to prefer the latter option, which despite its prohibitive cost would “solve the problem once and for all”.

Before that option can be explored however Putin will need to agree win back possession of the moon which has been in American hands ever since Jack Nicklaus won Richard Nixon’s cold war bet with Brezhnev by hitting a hole in one at the Sea of Tranquillity.

A spokesman said that the former KGB leader will do “whatever it takes” to secure these twin objectives.

Vladmir Putin has two little beady eyes.

Posted by damian at September 08, 2004 09:40 AM | TrackBack