Astute American shoppers will have noticed a new competitor in the battle for diet beverages in recent months - Diet Rite.

A new brand, from the established stable of Cadbury Schweppes Americas Beverages (catchy - Ed) - Diet Rite is a diet soft drink sweetened with Splenda that has zero carbs, zero calories and zero caffeine.

At the same time manufacturers have also ensured that it has zero nutritional value meaning that you can drink it all day, every day, without it having any impact on your waist line.

The product is endorsed by the Atkins foundation, the original proponents of a low carb lifestyle who told us "this is a great product."

However, for Mr Damian after endorsing a product with zero nutritional value, as well as zero carbs, calories and caffeine we wondered what Atkins would advocate next in a bid to help the world beat the bulge?

The answer is air.

"We believe that inhaling the right type of air can make you thinner" an Atkins spokesman told us. "If you live in the country the air that you breath is generally pretty good, but respiration doesn't help burn those unwanted calories," we were told.

"We're thinking of advocating that fat people move to the cities, as all the toxins and pollution in the air make your body work harder to filter the good stuff. According to scientists breathing in poor air may help you burn an extra 500 calories a day. Of course you tie younger, but you die thinner. It's a tough call," they added.

Indeed it is.

Posted by damian at November 18, 2004 06:57 PM | TrackBack