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WAP Site
Americans have today awoken horrified, with news that an Al-Qaeda hit squad have stolen the Christmas decorations off all the trees at the Rockefeller Centre, leaving nothing but some sorry Rockefeller Center tree lighting and of course the trees themselves.
| For New Yorkers this latest attack comes just three years since two hijacked planes crashed into the World Trade Centre killing several thousand people.
“To say this adds insult to injury would be an understatement - kick a city whilst it's down” Mayor Bloomberg told reporters whilst chuffing on a large cigarette inside his palatial mayoral office. Meanwhile in Washington, President Bush was woken from a peaceful dream about the Dixie Chicks to be told of the news, allegedly telling aides “we’re gonna get these folks.” |  Gawn, but not forgotten |
Former New York mayor, Rudolph Giuliani perhaps best summed up how the nation felt when he told Regis and Kelly “you steal baubles from the Rockerfeller Centre, you steal all our baubles.”
 Clay: big hearted, certainly not gay | Celebrities rushed to aid of the Big Apple, with former network news anchors, Tom Brokaw and Dan Rather agreeing to host a special telethon to raise money for more decorations.
“There will be Christmas in New York,” Clay Aiken told Mr Damian, as he simultaneously announced that a percentage of the profits from his special Christmas tour would go towards the appeal. Meanwhile WWF stars have agreed to hold a Santa Smackdown in Radio City Hall, and Tara Reid has agreed not to flash her nipples, all in aid of this yuletide appeal. Readers can donate used Christmas decorations via the Salvation Army or pledge money for the citizens of the Big Apple by calling 1-800-XMAS-IN-NY. The French appear not to give a shit. |
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