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December 06, 2004
Blunkett to unleash Fashion Police
Posted by damian at December 06, 2004 11:14 AM
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The UK’s beleaguered Home Secretary, David Blunkett, will today announce plans to introduce a new arm of the law.
 Blinding dress sense | For years New Labour has postulated about introducing an all powerful, fully functional fashion police, but it’s only now – with an election due in the next twelve months – that they feel the time is right to introduce this new branch of enforcement. Headed by Trinny and Sussanah from BBC TV’s What Not To Wear, the special task force promises to be “tough on fashion crime, tough on the causes of fashion crime.” Mr Damian understands that the first target will be mirrored sunglasses with Burberry casuals next on the list. |
| Chancellor Gordon Brown is understood to be an ardent supporter of the move, seeing it as a key mechanism for lifting children out of poverty by 2020.
A Treasury spokesman told us how poor fashion sense can keep able people out of work and also be a drain on the economy. He also suggested that the Government might introduce a special Shell Suit tax and ban the wearing of peddle pushers amongst varicose veins sufferers. Frank Sinatra was unavailable for comment. |
 Even Mr Damian's undies will have to go |
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